Fathers day can be a difficult day for many people.
For those who lost their daddy. For those who lost their husband and daddy of their children. For those who wanted a daddy or relationship with one. For the daddies who lost their babies. For those who yearn to be a daddy.
I want you to know, that you are not forgotten, this Fathers Day.
I would like to touch on infertility and Fathers Day. Often people will post images expressing heartfelt feelings towards women with infertility on Mothers Day. Yet, I realized this Fathers Day there are not those resources for Men on Fathers Day.
The truth is Infertility hurts men too. Even if their partner has the infertility factor, Fathers Day hurts. For the men who have an infertility factor, the pain is very internal and personal. Walking into the store, programs at church, family get gatherings are all reminders that he is yet, another year, childless.
The problem is that infertility is the grief that keeps on giving, cycling, and occurring.
Too often we set a standard that men have to be strong, emotionless, and the “rock” during hardship. Don’t get me wrong. I appreciate how my darling husband is my rock. However, I know that he too needs me as a rock. He too has grief. He too needs to try and work out his frustration. He too needs the time to heal.
The truth is, just like a woman can be a mother with no children, so can a man be a father with no children.
So to those who are struggling this fathers day. Know that you are loved. You are valued. You are important.
I didn’t marry my husband because of the quality of his swimmers. I didn’t marry him because he would be able to give me unlimited children. I married him because of the dashing, genuine, pure, and manly man he is! I married him because he already had qualities of a fantastic father. Had I known then, what I know now, I still would have taken his hand into eternity.
And I know, when we do have a baby, he is will be the best Dad. It will mean something different to him. It will be the answer to his deepest prayer.
